Four
weeks to negotiate a new relationship through intense intentional engagement in negotiation,
renegotiation, deal making and sealing the deal can lead to the design of a more
loving and productive relationship. Women
and men living in love and long-term relationships find it responsible to
communicate with each other to make sure the relationship provides a mutually
satisfying experience. When concerns are
noted, conversations take place to manage them in the most effective way.
Euphoric Love
A
Hebrew Bible paraphrase of the Song
of Solomon, Chapter 2 and verse sixteen reveals a woman declaring her love saying,
“All of me is given to my love and he may
take his fill of me.” The initial euphoria of love is so intensely good
feeling, there is nothing one will not do for love.
Challenged Love
Challenges
develop when the euphoria peaks and a real person is left behind. When both discover they loved the euphoria and
not with each other, relationship suffers.
This leads to the Hebrew Bible paraphrase of Proverbs
twenty – one and verse nineteen, “It is better to live alone in the desert
than with an angry nagging woman.”
The
journey from shared euphoric love to shared challenged love is a short one. Recovery from unhappiness in long-term relationship
requires the best that mature people can bring to resolve their situation.
Negotiate and Renegotiate
To negotiate
means to discuss something formally to reach agreement. Shakespeare
said, “Let every eye negotiate for itself and trust no agent.” By this, he meant nobody represents our
interests better than we do. In
relationship, each party must negotiate for their interest and be willing to
engage each other and work towards agreement in the interests of both. To
renegotiate means to discuss again the details of an
agreement to make it better. It means to
negotiate repeatedly if necessary.
Make a Deal and Seal It
Each
must ask tough questions. Each must be
mature enough to ask for what is wanted and needed. Each must honestly reveal their willingness to
love and live in love through intentional sharing of themselves and their
resources to the mutual satisfaction of each other. This willingness includes being giving, being
forgiving, and understanding the needs of each other and being willing to give
of self to meet those needs with love as the motivation.
Four
weeks of intense intentional engagement in negotiation, renegotiation, deal
making and sealing the deal can lead to the design of a design of a more loving
and productive relationship. In Week 1,
love each other enough to negotiate your interests. In Week 2, renegotiate your interests to make
sure each gets as much of what they want as possible. Be willing to give to each other in ways that
bring each other joy. In Week 3, make a
deal you can live with and believe in.
Make sure, there are scheduled times for looking back over the deal to
see if it is working as designed. Be
willing to make adjustments if necessary.
In Week 4, seal the deal however you have negotiated to seal the deal
and enjoy it.
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